Today Mother went out for her bi-weekly field trip, escorted by her private caregiver, Donna. The plan was for a quiet ride to enjoy summer foliage and an ice cream treat at Graeters. "What flavor would you like Joan? You can have any one of the flavors shown in the cases here." "I'll have chocolate," she replied. So a bowl of rich chocolate ice cream it was. Like a school-girl, Mother enjoyed her iced dessert. Loud and soft 'mmmms' could be heard in-between forced lip smacks. A lovely treat, for a lovely lady, on a beautiful summer's day.
On the trip away from Graeters, Mother began to recognize landmarks and streets that she had traveled before. Bethel Rd. was one of the paths she drove in her beloved Saturn Ion only three or four years prior. Mother's mood noticeably began to change. She asked when she was going home. She said that if she had a car, she could drive and buy her own ice cream. Donna could not give her the answers Mother wanted to hear, so she crossed her arms in angered silence as her caregiver continued to drive her back to her now permanent home at Darby Glenn.
Oh, the mood swings that Alzheimer's brings along with all of its other ugly aspects. In 90 short minutes Mother's mood had gone from content, to happy, to anger, to confusion. "No one told me that I can never go home again. Someone should have told me." Silence followed the rest of her time on the road, her jaw set. "We're here," said her caregiver, to which Mother replied, "You mean I have to live HERE the rest of my life?!" "Yes, Joan you do," her caregiver firmly, but sweetly explained to her.
Walking into Mother's facility, the sound of music clearly rang out from the Activities Center. "I like that music," Mother said, as she swayed down the hall toward the strumming of the guitar. Mother's caregiver helped her find a seat at the mini-concert, gave her a quick peck on the cheek, and walked back to her vehicle, putting the raps on yet another Friday field trip.
Like melting ice cream, Alzheimer's patients, caregivers, family members, researchers, and the medical professionals shiver at the prospects of the future around this fatal disease. Right now, there is no cure, there is no way to prevent Alzheimer's, and there's no effective treatment. So we all continue to wait out in the cold, looking at all of the flavors of questions standing before us, case by case, by case waiting for someone to take our order.
"They lean on the web, but it gives way; they cling to it, but it does not hold." Job 8:15
Showing posts with label chocolate. Show all posts
Showing posts with label chocolate. Show all posts
Friday, July 24, 2015
Monday, April 13, 2015
Short, but Sweet
My momma always said, "Life was like a box of chocolates. You never know what you're gonna get." ~ Forrest Gump
This morning, I woke up startled from a nightmare/dream that
seemed so very real. Mother was standing beside my bed offering me a piece of
her favorite chocolate, pecan turtles. She was loving and kind and when I asked
her why she wasn’t at her care facility, she sweetly told me that she had just
walked out the front door, took a ride with a nice man, stole a box of her
favorite chocolates from the local grocery store, and then walked to my house.
As I cleared the cobwebs from my foggy brain, I wasn’t sure
whether to be horrified or delighted at what I had just experienced! (or
dreamed I'd just experienced!)
Our minds are a funny thing, even for those of us who are not
living daily with the confusion of Alzheimer’s. We Advocates and Caregivers never
truly rest, our loved ones always on our minds. We toss and turn with the ravages
of this disease. We too seek respite from the wake of its devastation.
Maybe it was a dream or some wishful thinking that manifested itself into a dream. But, for now, I can smile, remembering that mother’s
favorite chocolates are what she would offer me if she were to walk through my
back door, into my bedroom, and reach down lovingly to offer me a piece while I'm sleeping.
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