Scrabble or Scramble?

Thanksgiving was a great day for Mother. She was in as chipper a mood as she had been for several weeks - really since her Alzheimer's diagnosis. I'm becoming hopeful that her newly added meds are helping to remove a few cobwebs from her thinking process.

Larry decided we should keep the day simple with minimal outside stimulation - staying at home and serving that ever traditional Thanksgiving dinner - lasagna! The day went well, we popped the lasagna into the oven, prepared the salad and rolls, set the table and had a delightful dinner. There was even laughter and playful teasing at the table. Yes, my husband's suggestion to "keep it simple" was paying big dividends.

After the dishes were cleared, we broke out the Scrabble board. My mother has always been a gifted competitor when it comes to words. Tonight proved to be no different except that her courage to form larger words seemed to be waning. Still quick to the board, she questioned her moves as soon as she made them. I praised her when she formed a word and encouraged her when she questioned herself. Tonight those tactics were working, so much so, that we played three games!

Fast forward two days later. While writing a check, Mother became confused at how to spell the word "hundred", and later in the day she spelled the word guide, "gyge". When changing channel on her TV she had forgotten that in order to get to channels below 10, she would need to insert a zero in front of the number so that the TV remove would recognize the channel. Her reply was I've never had to do that before, her mood frustrated. Everything seemed scrambled to her today.

I tend to be analytical...I ask a lot of questions...I want to know why. My own fears begin to emerge. Will I suffer this same malady? What will life be like for me twenty years from now?

I push the pause button on my thoughts and my whys. All of my fearful emotions and questions will need to wait for another day, because today is all we are guaranteed. It is our gift from God - a clean slate for writing the history of our own lives. When I look at life that way, I'm less anxious and more gentle. I'm not so hard on myself and others. It feels right.

Speaking of the word scrambled, I think I'll fix some toast and scrambled eggs for breakfast on this rainy November day. It's a good place to start my day - taking care of the caregiver and to rewind.